CONFLICT RESOLUTION - Part 2

Today, we will delve into the internal resolution of conflict within ourselves. Many pastors and ministry leaders may appear calm, peaceful, and serene on the outside, while internally experiencing turmoil due to conflicts with others. We can resemble ducks on a still lake, portraying tranquility, yet beneath the water, our feet are rapidly paddling away from perceived threats to our well-being.


The slightest conflict with someone can throw off my day. I can forget who I am (a child of God) and to whom I belong (the creator and ruler of all things, seen and unseen). Does this happen to you, too? My work with pastors and ministry leaders over the past few decades has taught me that even the best leaders struggle with this topic. So, if conflict and strife cause you angst, you are far from alone.


For me, three reasons explain why this happens:

1. Caring too much about what other people think.
   
2. Wanting to be liked.
   
3. Placing our value in what others say about us.
   
   
   

I am sure you can think of more reasons. Consider them, and reflect on Scriptures that may help you gain and maintain a proper perspective. The following passages really blessed me this morning. I pray they will bless you as well.


CARING TOO MUCH WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK
When we find that someone does not like us, agree with our opinion, or is critical of us, it can cause a host of human emotions that disturb our peace in Christ. If we live our lives based on what others think, then we are worshiping the false god of public opinion. We cannot be effective Christ-followers and Christian leaders if we live our lives in pursuit of the acceptance of others.
Scriptures that support this include:

• "Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ." (Galatians 1:10 NIV)
  
• "Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe." (Proverbs 29:25 NIV)
  
  
  

WANTING TO BE LIKED
Many of us like to believe that everyone likes us, and we often go out of our way to ensure that it is the case by doing or saying things to others to gain some type of positive affirmation that we are liked and accepted in our social circle of influence. The truth is, not everyone likes us or how we are. People that don’t know Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior particularly may not like us if we express our love and adoration for God, and our commitment to being a Christ-follower.


Scriptures that support this include:

• "Woe to you when everyone speaks well of you, for that is how their ancestors treated the false prophets." (Luke 6:26 NIV)
  
• "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first." (John 15:18 NIV)
  
  
  

PLACING OUR VALUE IN WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT US
It is easy to think that our value comes from what others say about us. Self-esteem, the esteem we give ourselves, has to be solely based on God’s Word, for us to avoid this tendency of over-valuing the opinion of others. What God says about us is that we are fully and wholly loved children of the most-high God of all, and we are totally loved and accepted by Him. As Christ-followers, we need to lean on Scripture for our identity.


Scriptures that support this include:

• "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." (1 Peter 2:9 NIV)
  
• "So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them." (Genesis 1:27 NIV)
  
  
  

CONCLUSION
When we are judged, disrespected, criticized, ostracized, or simply “not liked,” it is an opportunity to review what God says about us and realize that no human defines us. Only God our Father, Christ His Son, and the Holy Spirit - The Blessed Triune God of All - only He defines us. Therefore, when we run into conflict, as we all do, we can remember who we truly are and to whom we truly belong.


Praise God for this wonderful fact: We are eternal beings having a human experience. Our home is in Heaven, with God, who loves us perfectly, today, tomorrow, and forever. Amen. (NIV)
​

Your aspiring servant, Daniel M.
January 24, 2024
POSTSCRIPT: Dear friends, if this daily, transparent “Conversations with Christ” blesses you, please go to www.SOLIDpastors.org, where you will find these posted, and a repository of all, in English and Spanish. If you ever want to chat, you can reach me at [email protected]. May Christ bless you richly as you have your own intimate, daily conversations with Christ.