QUICK, SLOW, SLOW - Part 1 of 3

As I read James 1:19 this morning, it made me think of a ballroom dance instructor calling out dance moves. How awkwardly my feet move at times to this perfect rhythm of quick, slow, slow.


“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry ...” (James 1:19 NIV)


Many times, I am Slow, Quick, Quick. Perfectly opposite the directive we find here; it does not produce the righteousness that God desires. Slow to listen, quick to speak, and quick to become angry is a perfect description of me in my earlier days as a Christ-follower. Then, I became a bi-vocational ministry leader and started taking this Christian walk more seriously. We are admonished: “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.” (James 1:22 NIV)


While this dance lesson is good for all Christ-followers, it is especially important for any Christian vocational or marketplace leader. Just like in a dance, there is a right order of operations for a smooth, graceful flowing of the Holy Spirit through us and unto others.


QUICK TO LISTEN
It is so easy for intelligent leaders to finish other people’s sentences for them. Either out loud or silently, we all have done it. “I know where this is headed” is our corresponding thought, as our mind wanders off to formulate a response to what we are hearing. “Not so fast,” Scripture instructs us. Listen, and carefully hear what is being said. We need to hear not only the words but the meaning below the words. This demands our full attention.


Recently, a friend told me he wanted to have a party at his home. He began to describe his vision for the gathering: “I’d like to have some friends over, as a real casual thing.” I completely missed the words “some” and “casual”, and my brain went right to a solution. “I’ll send out an invite to my network,” I offered. Ted said “yes” without realizing exactly what that meant, for he really did not understand, and nor did I explain, the sizable network I was planning to access.


My “instant idea” was to introduce my new friend to many other friends and acquaintances. After all, wouldn’t that be a good thing? My promotion of the party went well and produced a result that I thought was fantastic: 50 people confirmed for the party tomorrow at Ted’s house. However, yesterday I asked him if he was pleased with the guest list. It was then that he shared with me how unhappy his wife was with such a large crowd coming to his home to eat. His vision was a small, intimate gathering of friends, and not a big party. Ouch!


I was slow to listen and completely missed the mark.


ACTIONS TO TAKE
How often does that happen to you? Are you doing your own dance moves like I sometimes still do, or are you dancing in step with the Holy Spirit? If you need to be “quicker to listen” like me, what actions can you take to do so? If you already have the “quick to listen” part down, how can you help us “Ready, Fire, Aim” kind of leaders to slow down and better hear what you are saying?


We all can improve in this area, can’t we?


CONCLUSION
Being quick to listen is the mark of a mature Christ-follower. Especially for those in leadership, we need to model this behavior of “Quick, Slow, Slow” to others. For those already accomplished at the “Quick to Listen” part, you can help others by speaking up when you are not being fully understood.


The technique that works well in both cases is called “Active Listening.” Grossly over-simplified, here is what you can do to practice this. Repeat back to the speaker what you are hearing, paraphrasing what is being said, to ensure you are hearing correctly. And, when someone does that for you, be vocal about correcting the paraphrased statement if that is not what you are saying. Often, the differences are very nuanced, and we have to listen carefully and with our full attention to pick up on subtle cues that can mean big differences in outcomes.


Tomorrow, I’ll take on the second of these three powerful instructions: “Slow to Speak.”
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Your aspiring servant, Daniel M.
February 02, 2024
POSTSCRIPT: Dear friends, if this daily, transparent “Conversations with Christ” blesses you, please go to www.SOLIDpastors.org, where you will find these posted, and a repository of all, in English and Spanish. If you ever want to chat, you can reach me at [email protected]. May Christ bless you richly as you have your own intimate, daily conversations with Christ.